You can spot them easily in the movies — the couple that’s so clearly meant for each other. But in real life, it can be harder to detect a perfect match.
That’s especially true when that “match” involves ourselves. Sometimes we’re so wrapped up in our relationships that we don’t even ask ourselves if we’re actually a good fit.
Relationship expert Talia Goldstein, CEO of white glove matchmaking service Three Day Rule, told INSIDER that there are four major signs that a couple is a good match.
If a relationship demonstrates each of these attributes, Goldstein explained, that’s how you know it’s built to last.
1. You travel the same way.
One of the easiest ways to tell if you’re a good match with your partner is to plan a trip together.
“A good match is people who are willing and wanting to travel the same way,” Goldstein said.
If one of you wants to hop in a RV and road trip to Mexico, while the other wants to fly first class and stay at a give star resort, that’s a sign that you aren’t a good fit.
“It’s indicative of your lifestyle,” Goldstein said. “It could lead to problems down the road.”
For example, these lifestyle difference could come into play when it’s time to buy a house or pick an education path for your children, the expert explained.
“If you have a really narrow mind about the way that you travel, you probably have that same mindset in other aspects of your life,” she added.
2. You have common interests that you love doing together.
It may seem intuitive, but a great way to tell if you are a good match with a person is to determine whether you have common interests.
That doesn’t mean that you just like the same sort of art or listen to the same sort of music. Instead, good matches not only enjoy similar things — they like doing those things together.
“There should be at least two or three things you really like to do together,” Goldstein said. “It should be about spending time together.”
And so, if you’re a couple who, for instance, enjoys going on long walks together, playing board games together or watching the same sport games together, you’re likely a good match.
3. Your relationship has the right balance.
Most of the successful pairings Goldstein has witnessed involves people that strike a perfect balance, where one of them is “the star” while the other is more of “the rock.”
“I found that the majority of my success stories fall into those categories, where sometimes one of them is outgoing and the life of the party, where the other is more stable and supportive,” Goldstein said.
People with different energies tend to compliment each other, whereas those who are both super outgoing or both extremely introverted don’t always go the distance.
“If you have the yin and the yang, they balance each other out,” the expert explained. “I’ve found that balance works really well in a relationship.”
4. You’re with someone who makes you feel good about yourself.
It seems like common sense — you should be with someone who makes you feel like you’re at your best. But of course, a lot of people end up in relationships where they don’t really feel like themselves.
“Relationships where you truly feel like you’re the best version of yourself — that’s the best way to see if you’re a good match,” Goldstein said.
Being in a relationship where you feel like yourself means that you don’t have to stretch to come up with topics to talk about.
It’s also when you feel at home with their group of friends, or feel comfortable lounging around in your pajamas with the other person.
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