Welcome back to the second episode of our funny journey into the world of Busoga’s clever con artists. Today, we will look at the funny identities of some key players, starting with the infamous kanaabe boy, a master of disguise who seems to have a special connection with luck.
To most people, this boy looks skinny and clueless, wandering through the village like he just came from a mud wrestling match. He talks so slurred that it sounds like he’s been drinking too much waragi, mumbling words that seem like a secret code. Enter the grandfather, who swoops in to help out, acting as the translator for this so-called “dumb” boy. The old man, also dirty and ragged, looks so weak that you might offer him a seat on a bus. He plays his role well, telling clients to “forgive the boy’s foolishness” and rushing the deal along, claiming he needs to get back to the distillery to keep an eye on the waragi. Together, these two look like a comedy act, pretending they have no clue about money or its value, like two chickens trying to play chess.
The kanaabe boy acts so clueless that he might even ask for just 1,000 Ugandan shillings or a donut and soda as a deposit. It’s so ridiculous that it makes you laugh, and that’s what catches you off guard. His job is to make you feel smarter than him. You start to believe he has no idea about the treasure he holds. But don’t be fooled! This “Mawaya” is sharper than a rat in a cheese factory. He’s as smooth as the scams he pulls off.
While you get excited about the promised riches, small details start to slip by. For example, the kanaabe boy who pretends to be a fool, takes a moment to step behind our car and check the license plate. Why would a boy who knows nothing care about a car number? It’s a small sign, one we would have noticed if we weren’t so focused on the fake dollar signs dancing in our heads. This “dumb” boy knows what he’s doing. After all, even a goat knows when to run from a lion!
But here’s the twist: the grandfather isn’t an old man at all. He’s just pretending to be a harmless elder, acting like he’s keeping the kanaabe in line. They are like expert actors in a play designed to pull you into their trap. Their con is so smooth that it would take a sharp person to see through it. But who pays attention when all you can think about is going back to Kampala with a bag full of dollars? You might as well be dreaming about starting your own bank with those fake bills!
Now, here’s where things get even more interesting. These village scammers don’t work alone. Their leader is a young man who could make even money cheer. He’s got everything, power, connections, and lots of cash to throw around. He walks into a room, and the dollar bills seem to say, “Here comes our hero!” In our next episode, we’ll reveal who he is and expose his empire. But that’s not all. Remember those celebrities we hinted at? They’ve also fallen for these con artists from Busoga. You’d think Kampala’s elite would be too smart for this, but as they say, “Kampala si Bizimbe
Even the most important people can get caught in the trap of deception.
Some of these celebrities, who live in Makindye and other fancy areas of Kampala, have been tricked by these crafty Busoga boys. This shows that even the clever city folks can be outsmarted by the smooth scams of rural masterminds. How did these urban stars get tricked by village boys? Well, you know what they say: “A big frog does not jump in the day without reason.” We’ll name names and share more in the next edition, so stay tuned.
Until then, remember: If you ever find yourself with a seemingly clueless kanaabe and his frail grandfather offering you a deal that sounds too good to be true, keep your wallet close. You might just be their next target.
And just so you know, the author of this article is a proud Kamulian from the next village over. Yes, he, too, has tasted the bitter fruit of deception, after all, “A fool and his money are soon parted.” So, learn from these mistakes, dear readers, and stay sharp out there. The next kanaabe you meet might be the one to make you rethink your life choices!
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