For quite some time, there is a discussion that has been on social media for some long time and its some funny discussion that involves men and women, girls and boys, and ladies and gentlemen. The discussion has got everyone claiming to be the beneficiary of the discussion and this discussion has been a financially motivated debate on whether men should always first send transport money for their girl friends to pay them a visit.
I am a male and of course my submission will be considered to be vague by a good number of females but it’s based on facts and truth only, for the females out there I will wait for that time when you will write and give reasons as to why transport money is always the first priority every time your boyfriend asks to see you.
When my young sisters or brothers want to visit me at my place, they find their way to my place and none has ever asked me for transport to come and spend some days at my place, when an old girl/lady/woman asks to visit you, she also asks for transport money and the two words (visit you and transport money) have become twin statement in many of the discussions men have with women.
On many occasions, it’s always men who invite their girlfriends to visit them and its okay sending transport money though asking to meet someone doest qualify to sending transport. The other side of the scenario is when someone decides to want to visit a man but still says that “I want to visit you but I don’t have transport, please send me some money via mobile money”. So this means that boy child is always supposed to suffer with issues that do not concern him and is automatically the minister for transport.
I am sometimes forced to think that we are over bullied by women and we seriously need interventions by the concerned parties to help us as men, for sure I understand we many not even be having any international organization that fights for our right as men so we end up being vulnerable in a number of issues.
I know for a fact that not every woman you meet will be after your money. Not every woman will care that you do want or don’t want to pay her transport fares when all she’s trying to do is come to you to spend more time with you, hoping to get to know you better especially when the dating has just started.
However, you should know this much. Your attitude as a man towards money does speak volumes about the type of person you are, regardless of how much you actually have. Sometimes it’s not a matter of who is better off. It’s not a matter of if you don’t pay for everything you’re not a real man just like some ladies think, I just think it’s a matter of willingness to share, willingness to show the true you and it’s a matter of knowing what matters most, whether the woman or the money spent on her.
Some time back in some whatsapp group where I am a member, some friend of mine MMP the group admin was bitter with some lady who keeps asking him for transport money and on addition to transport money the lady also adds a budget for snacks to eat while travelling something that looks so childish, this gender always wants to skip growing up and reasoning humanly.
Even while we were still in upper primary I remember girls used to ask us for money yet we could all spend the entire the day at school and such scenarios showed me that growing up will be more of a hustle especially in relationships so I have grown up baring in mind that the female gender needs money more than the male gender that strives a lot for it.
But anyway, before all the women can ambush me for going against their beloved vise, I just want us all to live a life of being fair to each other, a relationship isn’t business that a lot has to be spent on a woman and even meeting her requires spending a lot, women can look forward and think like a woman of today and tomorrow, not like the other woman who was not emancipated. I just think this emancipation should be used very well in that you pay your transport fares, Air tickets and even decide to take your boyfriends out on dates and pay for all the costs. This will keep motivating us to be ood lover boys but these things of asking for everything suck a lot.
Finally, I think the most important piece of dating etiquette for a woman is to be respectful of the man you are dating. Be respectful of how you treat him, and be respectful of his wallet if he is paying. If you respect him, he will respect you, and hopefully that will lead to a long and happy relationship together, lasting much longer than a few KFC/JAVAS dinner dates that many of you want
Michael Woira is a boy child advocate
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