Friends, I told you before that Chairman Norbert Mao (CM) aka ‘Gulu Gladiator’ is one politician you wouldn’t want to be in a country without. He is such a political nefarious fella that you mess with him at your own peril.
And if you were asked to bring five canning Ugandans, Mao would enter the room after President Museveni, followed closely by Anita Anet Among (Speaker of Parliament), Beti Namisango Kamya (IGG) and Frank Gashumba who is a social critique of repute.
And he would enter the room first if the yardstick is one’s acidic tongue.
More importantly, Mao is like that old friend you wouldn’t want to meet at a wedding because he will spoil everything for you. He has a potent character; a sneaky or fake smile behind it an allegorical character. He likes to make witty and quirky remarks which hurts a lot.
What has Chairman Mao done this time around?
He is attempting to change the constitution by introducing comprehensive amendments aimed at a smooth transfer of power. At least this is the idea to the naked eye. But when binoculars are applied, CM is surely targeting President Yoweri Museveni a man he has spent decades trying to relive of duty.
After 40 years of one party dominating our political space, the best people like Mao can come up with are constitutional reforms which are themselves vague and not bitting enough!
The ‘age- limit’ was done away with and ‘term- limit’ buried. So what other logical reforms or safeguards the Chairman is bringing this time that will future political stability?
If the amendments don’t talk about ‘removing’ soldiers from Parliament, what is he telling us? If they don’t address the issue of gerrymandering constituencies, what use are those amendments? If they don’t address reducing Parliament to a manageable number of MPs, they don’t make sense. They don’t even curtail the President’s astronomical powers as the Fountain of Honor!
To me, CM is simply looking for ‘likes’ or rejuvenating his waning relevancy.
Every night, when he returns home to his beautiful new wife, they seat and have a chuckle at the inadequacies of Ugandans. She inwardly admires him for his brilliance and flip-floping character.
If you visit a village and the only sane person left is the village prostitute, then that village is doomed. This is now Uganda and CM is the only ‘relevant’ person left to be trusted with our kids!
The thing is: CM’s constitutional amendments brings no relief to anyone. They neither help Mr. Museveni to perpetually stay in power nor assist the opposition to snatch that power from him.
What CM wants changed is far different from what Ugandans want changed. It is therefore a one man’s pipe dream against the wishes and aspirations of an entire people.
I would be wrong to even suggest that some one is putting CM to that task but that someone stands to lose the most if those reforms sails through Parliament.
CM removed from the shelves Uganda’s oldest and most prestigious political party- a party of great men like Benedicto Kiwanuka, Paul Ssemwogerere, Bonifansi Byanyima, Francis Bwengye, Maria Mutagamba, Katikajira Mukasa, Kafumbe Mukasa, name others and gave it free of charge to President Museveni.
And what did CM get in return? A not- so- important ministerial post even at the expense of drailing his own hitherto well orchestrated political life.
At one time President Museveni whispered to an aide that: “The only two things I fear in Uganda is Milton Obote and the Democratic Party!”
Well, Obote is dead and DP is now in a “wheelbarrow and President Museveni is pushing it around.” In Chairman Mao’s own words:
“Museveni loves to drive every appointment into his cabinet like a wheelbarrow. He shall tie you with a rope and drag you to wherever you don’t want to go but he shall have decided that it is where you should go.”
Friends, do you now the dangers of having people like CM surrounding our president? They are the ‘ants’ which eats the palmnut I often talk about in my articles.
Well, one clever person once said that: “When you live too much in the limelight; you will soon get blinded by the light!”
Chairman Norbert Mao might surely be heading to that direction and the NRM government, led by its spokesperson Ofwono Opondo (OO), is helping him reach there faster.
“Don’t think you’re that important!” OO roared at CM.
WHO IS CHAIRMAN MAO ANYWAY?
CM is as smart as a fox but also slippery as a eel. He is a master of abusive words and a perennial liar. If you’re smart; you don’t pick a fight with CM otherwise he will expose your mother’s something something!
He single-handedly fought and floored powerful people in DP like Erias Lukwago, Lulume Bayiga, Betty Nambooze and Lubega Mukaku ultimately ending up ‘owning’ Uganda’s oldest and most prestigious political party. He had earlier, through sheer guts, stolen the same Democratic Party from Nasser Ntege Ssebaggala; from the Catholic Church (Mao is Protestant/ Anglican) and of course from its historical base: Baganda people (Mao is an Acholi).
A few years ago, CM took on Bobi Wine and his army of social media abusers and emerged the winner. He is not a sensationalist like the late Tamale Mirundi and Frank Gashumba, but when he speaks: we all pay attention.
Almost like Mr. Museveni, Chairman Mao is one person everyone likes to despise indeed underestimate.
He is a small man by stature but with a loud- sweet voice which can convince you to give him your last coin. He is a smooth operator who gets what he wants even at the alter of sacrificing his own principles.
From the days of the Makerere Guild Presidency, to the Chairmanship of Gulu, to vying for the leadership of DP pitting himself against the extraordinary Nasser Ntege Ssebaggala, to standing for president twice, no one ever gave him a chance.
Now he is facing Africa’s strongest statesman and advising him to quit the presidency.
Well, we can only guess what will happen to CM if and when Mr. Museveni retires. It is unlikely that Bobi Wine will even appoint him as a Presidential Advisor and Gen. MK has made it clear that none soldiers shouldn’t think of getting closer to his State House!
Chairman Mao is the only Ugandan left who still believes that President Museveni did not compromise the Democratic Party and rendered it a spent force almost like Uganda People’s Congress (UPC).
That is why CM was quoted saying that:
“But you know NRM is not a party. It is an association for eating. There are only two parties; UPC and DP. The rest are projects!”
No wonder NRM diehards like Ofwono Opondo (OO) are irreversibly hurt when they see President Museveni hobnobbing with CM. To them, it is absolutely wrong for their boss to often pick from the enemy camp people he ‘rewards’ with juicy positions.
Funny that OO had summarized CM’s well- orchestrated political life and reduced it to a mere dot.
“Mao is a token appointment when Museveni had to appease Acholi people after the death of Speaker Jacob Oulanyah!” So said Ofwono Opondo the man who speaks for government.
I thought OO is not supposed to know that let alone say it publicly!
I have a good friend of mine called Willy who likes to ask so often: “Naye ani afuga Uganda- who is in charge of Uganda?”
When Joseph Kony looked like a run-away bride, CM rolled up his sleeves and entered the jungle to talk to him. Kony had killed Chris Opoka (my school mate at Gombe S.S) for knowing too much but Mao faced him regardless.
Now this small man has stolen the Democratic Party from the most oiled political machines in Uganda. Now it is his to do with as he pleases including but not limited to renting it to President Yoweri Museveni.
Did you know that Mao’s ex-wife was an aide to Maama Janet Museveni? His young brother was a permanent fixture at Mr. Museveni’s State House doing errands for the state. Of course CM was mothered by a Munyankole lady and an Acholi UPC-supporting father.
CM speaks better Luganda (akokya n’ okokya) than most Baganda and can haul insults in Luganda than any person you will ever meet.
This is the enigma who has tabled bills many believe are in tandem with President Museveni’s wishes and dreams and yet others believe strongly that CM is disguising his real intentions: incapacitating the President then move in for a kill!
BY WAY OF CONCLUSION:
Who else has seen CM’s political maneuvering?
I think it is the other ‘smart’ fellow called Ofwono Opondo (OO). This OO fella, the official government mouth- piece is now attacking CM for meddling into NRM’s affairs when he is not even a member of the party.
Well, OO thinks that CM cannot start talking about an array of electoral reforms making it look like it is the government or Mr. Museveni’s position.
Like we continue to observe the strange new behavior from the now 80 years old President, none of the two bickering men (CM and OO) knows for sure what he, Mr. Museveni, thinks or even believes!
When you hear CM speaking, you can be convinced that President Museveni has told him to air those views on his behalf. Said differently: when CM speaks about government programs, you can’t be faulted for thinking that President Museveni was in the other room pulling the strings.
Whatever you might think or believe, President Museveni is using CM to hoodwink the rest of us. And CM, despite all his knowledge and “bujagujagu- canning”, is not aware of what he is being pushed into. Like OO predicted: “CM will find himself without a job soon!”
I know you hate me for often saying that President Museveni is a genius. After seeing what he has done to Chairman Mao (another genius); what do think we should call Mr. Museveni?
Folks, in the current President Museveni’s government, the certain is the uncertainty!
LAST WORD: “I wanted to take Muwanga Kivumbi to court over his allegations but when I consulted with my lawyers, they advised me that stupidity is not an offense!”
– Chairman Nobert Mao
Adam Kamulegeya
adamkam2003@gmail.com
0779 104 336
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